


Languished - Chapter I - A Kylo Ren Fanfiction

by jerichosummers



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Eventual Smut, Ex-Padawans, F/M, Knights of Ren - Freeform, Possible Character Death
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-13
Updated: 2016-04-11
Packaged: 2018-06-01 17:33:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6529465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jerichosummers/pseuds/jerichosummers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Okay, so the reason why I did not choose to use abbreviations like (Y/N) is simply because I felt it was harder to be descriptive when you can only use things like (Y/N), (E/C) , (H/C) , ect. In fact, it isn't typical of me to use abbreviations what-so-ever.</p></blockquote>





	Languished - Chapter I - A Kylo Ren Fanfiction

The Finaliser was bustling as a defeated Kylo Ren was rushed to the medical deck. He continued insisting he was fine, leaving the nurses frustrated and perplexed considering blood caked his skin, wounds still bleeding as he limped through the halls. His black clothing was damp with sweat, tears and blood. He was fatigued, struggling to drag himself around the corridors and halls until being checked into the infirmary, finally collapsing into the bed.

Runa was first to see that he was in trouble and as a young nurse, her instinct was to rush to his side. His golden eyes fluttered shut as his enfeebled body slipped into a calm slumber. His anxious breaths now slowing down to a orderly pace and his face softened. He hadn't seen the girl's face clearly but her soft touch began triggering small but melancholic memories from when the two were young. His nose wrinkled from the stinging of peroxide as she dabbed the freshly stitched wound across his face. She noticed that he had more cuts and bruises marking his skin and felt his warm, vital fluid bleeding through his tattered robes.

"Damn it, Ben. I'm surprised you hadn't bled to death."

She had known him. She recognised his face since he stumbled into the infirmary moments earlier. She heard a faint moan from Ben and she shook him. "Get up, old friend. I must tend to you more."

This took the former padawan back to the mornings before training, where Runa would desperately shake him in attempt to awaken him.

"Ben! Ben! Ben get up!"

The pestering girl's voice rang through his head.

His eyes opened and he sprang up, shooting a glare at the young nurse.

"G-get out of my head." He stuttered between heavy breaths.

"Did I hurt you by any chance, sir?" She was slightly baffled by his sudden outburst. His violent wave of nostalgia left him sweating, tears rimming his dark eyes.

"No, I hurt you..." His expression soon softened.

Runa's eyes widened. It all came back to her as well.

-

_Rain was crashing down upon the lifeless corpses of the dead padawans. She ran for her life, sprinting as far away as possible. Her tears fell almost as hard as the rain did. Bodies were scattered around her. Her friends, frozen in an apathetic state. She continued running until she felt herself bump into a tall, dark, masked figure looming over her. It was so dark, the only source of light was the glow of the defective, red lightsaber and the spirit of the remaining padawan._

_Where was Ben?_

With the wave of the masked man's hand she fell into his arms, now property of the First Order.

 

-

She knew Ben had fallen into the forces of the dark, but she didn't know where. All she knew was her job in the infirmary and her life as a former padawan. She didn't expect Ben to be Kylo Ren himself. She kept all of the memories of pain and suffering locked away in the back of her mind. She didn't want to remember any of it.

After the massacre she woke up in a cell and was assigned her job in the kitchen, only seeing the shadowy monster that killed a generation of Jedi roam the halls once in a while. She had tried everything on the Finaliser, but nursing had been her best trade without using the force.

"Excuse me?"

Ben paused, sighing and removing his tunic so she could address the gash on his abdomen, laying back down on his pillow. He winced in pain.

She glanced back at him before bandaging him. He soon drifted off to sleep and Runa placed a kiss on his forehead, gingerly whispering 'Goodnight' and placed a blanket over his resting body before leaving his room.

She was quite tired herself, trudging down the hallway to her quarters before being stopped by General Hux.

"I'm sorry to say your shift isn't over quite yet, Miss. Odasa."

She sighed and rolled her eyes, which were rimmed with dark circles. She was still quite fed up with the fact that the man would appear unannounced just to tell you what you have to do and why you were doing it wrong.

"Why so, General?"

"One of Captain Phasma's men are injured from training, he must have broken a limb." He answered.

"Another one? Sith, half of your men would be dead by the time their training ends."

"Dead, physically, no, but mentally, well… That's just what we desire."

Runa rolled her eyes at his antics.

What a sociopath.

"Okay, General."

She said sarcastically. Even after his shift, he still tries to sound threatening yet in some way, but besides this, the General always seemed more friendly after hours.

Obviously when he isn't thinking about killing millions.

"So how's Ren? I see you have been looking after him tonight."

"He's resting. I advise you don't disturb him, General."

"Aw, shame. Don't overwork yourself."

She scoffed. "You're the one telling me what to do."

"Just doing my job!" He stated as he continued walking down the hallway. She watched him before she wandered off back to the infirmary, checking on Ren before making her way to her next patient. He was silent, sleeping soundly as the night crept on.

-

The next morning she went to check on her old friend, suprised to see him already awake, sitting up on his bed. She only hoped he was asleep. She didn't feel like talking to anyone at this hour, especially him. Runa nervously knocked on the glass door with a fresh change of clothing on her arm. He signaled her to come in. She stepped through the door, setting the clothes down on the table beside his bed and cleared her throat to grasp his attention.

"I thought you were dead. All of this time and I wonder— why didn't you kill me?"

A silence fell over the room for a few moments and Ren turned to look at her.

"I couldn't bring myself to do it. You were the only person that truly cared about me. I couldn't train you as a Knight because I couldn't bear the thought of the darkness engulfing you as it did to me."

 

She stayed silent. He continued,

"You didn't know who I was all of those times you scurried away in the halls?"

"I couldn't stand looking at you for ages. I was scared. I didn't know the man behind the mask was you, Ben."

He didn't bother correcting her. The way that name rolled off her tongue sent shivers down his spine.

"I'm sorry." He stood up, his pale chest covered in bruises and scars. He slipped on the fresh tunic and cape, his arrogant, handsome face turned to look at her. Her features graced with a scowl.

"You should have said that years ago."

Runa excused herself, but before she could make it out the door, a cold hand grabbed her wrist and pulled her back.

He always pulled her back.

He looked down at her and lifted her chin. He saw the fear in her pitiful face before extending his arm and searching through her thoughts. She could feel him dissecting her brain, scanning through every memory. Runa struggled.

"What the hell are you-"

"Don't worry. I just want to see when you and I were happy together. You just seem so miserable."

Tears began to fall from Runa's eyes as he kept turning back to a certain memory.

-

_Runa was fifteen, while Ben was sixteen. They ran around through the trees, trying to find each other._

_"Runa~~!!" Ben called out playfully._

_"Try to catch me!" She shouted back, running through the forest._

_"What's in it for me?"_

_Runa snickered._

_"A kiss!"_

_Runa ran faster, soon hiding behind a tree. Ben wandered around for a few moments, no Runa in sight. He tiptoed toward a certain tree that rustled moments before. An exhausted Runa resting her back on the wood. She heard his footsteps and turned around. The boy grabbed her arm, pulling her towards him._

_"I believe you owe me something?"_

_Runa rolled her eyes and tried to pull her hand away._

_"Ben, I was joking."_

_"No you weren't."_

_She rolled her eyes and pecked his cheek, the two both turning a shade of deep scarlet. Ben looked into her eyes, causing her to look away in embarrassment before he held up her chin._

_"It's more like this…"_

_He crashed his lips into hers. After a few moments he pulled away and Runa's eyes were wide._

_She was speechless._

 

After that she had fallen in love with her best friend.

They were mere kinder, dumb yet larger than life. All they knew was that they were innocent and couldn't hurt a soul.

At least one of them.

"I know how you felt after that day."

The two had returned to reality. Runa's body was shaken by her quiet sobs.

"You fell in love with him. You cared so much for him and yet, you always waited for him. But he's gone now. He's a monster."

"What are you trying to do to me?" She shouted, tears spilling from her eyes.

"I'm trying to pick up where we left off! Runa, I miss you!"

"Miss me? You or Ben?" Runa stormed out of the room, wiping tears from her face. She could feel him still dabbling around in her thoughts. He wasn't leaving her head.

-

She sat in her room. He just wouldn't leave.

He wouldn't go away.

A knock was heard on her door. She sensed who it was, contemplating whether or not to answer him.

The door opened on its own with the flick of his wrist. Ren wandered around her living quarters before she emerged from her room, uninvited.

"You've really made this place look nice."

"Mhm…"

He saw the hurt in her eyes. That is when Kylo Ren was then Ben Solo.

"I'm sorry about… earlier. I can't get you out of my head."

"Than why are you still wandering around in mine."

He gulped.

He stepped closer to Runa, holding her face. His eyes were getting lost in hers, she wasn't sure if her heart had beaten so fast in her life. It felt like electricity was running through her body. She felt her face burning up as he leaned closer to her face. She felt him breathing.

"You kept running away from me and now that I have caught you…"

Before he continued, he crashed her lips into hers. The longing for her taste was unbearable. A current was sent all through her untouched body, melting into his passionate and hungry kiss. He was languished for contact. She wrapped her arms around his neck, soon pulling away. A wave of euphoria fell over the both of them.

 

Runa looked down at her feet, ashamed that she gave in. She didn't know what to say.

Ren broke the painful silence.

"Ru, I've been thinking..."

Ru. He had not called her that it years. It was comforting to hear that pet name.

"I want to train you as my apprentice."

"Why?"

"I think… I think you need to learn the dark arts. It's paining me to see the light still in you. Please, come to the dark side. Come to the dark so you can be with me."

"I don't want to be with you. At least… I don't think so.…

"I understand."

He leaned down for another kiss, this time more soft and sweet rather than ravenous and longing. Runa's fingers ran themselves through his ebony waves and he held her close before disappearing into the hallway.

She hated herself for giving in.

-

 

That night she had been working at the infirmary. But this time, not for injury. The poor nurse had to preform an execution, under General's orders. As much as she cared for Hux and respected him, she never understood why he was so bloodthirsty, how such a friend could somehow be such a foe to others.

He was cold and demanding, yet charming and considerate. Before becoming a nurse in the infirmary, Runa had been assigned to work in the kitchen, but he noticed her carefulness and helpful demeanors and had assigned her as a nurse after she had complained of lack of interest and skill. Rather than barking at her, he kindly changed her assignment. It seemed to be the only thing she was interested in at the time.

The prisoner was strapped down in the chair, pale and shaking. Runa filled the syringes and watched as the translucent liquid flowed into the syringe. She tapped it lightly with her finger, the General watching close behind her. Casually making small talk as she filled another man's veins with poison.

"Ren wants me as his apprentice, what do you think about that?"

Hux furrowed his eyebrows.

"Does he not think that the job I had assigned you is fitting?"

"I'm not sure about that, Hux. But I actually used to train as a Jedi, along with him."

 

The prisoner moaned and wailed as the hydrochloric acid laced with other chemicals ripped through his veins. The dosage was enough to cause their vitals to deteriorate. The chemical was designed to torture it's victim, killing them slowly.

"Shut up, you filthy swine!" He spat at the prisoner before the prisoner fell silent, his eyes motionless and heart beat almost nonexistent. His face drained of colour and his breathing inaudible. He simply was just a lifeless cadaver.

"Give the man a break, we're injecting him with a chemical cocktail that's going to tear through his insides. Not the most glamorous thing to happen to him."

 

"So you were a force user?" He questioned as she disposed of the syringe.

"It should have been in my data pad. But I can see why Ren hadn't put the information there."

"If you were a Jedi, why hasn't Ren killed you yet?"

"I ask the same thing every day."

She picked up a syringe.

"I suppose I can do the deed now."

She joked, a faint smile forming on the General's face.

She paused.

"We actually used to love each other at one point." Her voice became indistinct and she put down the syringe and turned back to face the rather confused man.

"You, love Ren?" He asked, his voice was bemused as the two left the room, strolling down the halls of the infirmary.

"He was a flower that wilted when you looked at him the wrong way. He wasn't Kylo Ren. He was Ben to me."

"He still wilts, only he destroys the other flowers around him." The General said.

Ren had destroyed her, his words and actions stung like venom. But that venom exerted from his kiss has left her hypnotised and trying to suck the poison out on her own.  
-

The next day she had gotten dressed in her uniform. She had woken up an hour before noon, exhausted from the night shift before. She freshened herself up before making her way to the main room of her quarters. On table lay a lightsaber.

Runa turned on the lightsaber, revealing a glowing, white blade of light. She gazed at it and sighed before turning if off. It was white. Just as her old one. It was almost identical to her former lightsaber.

In fact, it was hers. She had remembered the pattern that lined the barrel of the saber, a scratch on the rim. It was polished but still rusted. It hasn't been touched in years.

Yet, kept it all this time.

She quickly set it down as memories and visions came back to her. Voices rang through her head. Sounds of crying, screaming and terror brought her back memories of suffering, all from one dark night.

In that moment she started to despise him little by little, while he came to love her more as time went on. Before he had filled his head with false hopes, that one day, it would all be exactly how it was. Her solace seemed only to despise him, for her former affection had torn her to pieces.

Dew began to blur her eyes, falling unto her cheeks as she remembered the terrified young girl running through the rain trying to escape the chaos surrounding her.

She was still broken and in shock while he still tried to rule the world.

Footsteps interrupted the memories that haunted her mind.

Speak of the devil himself, adorned in nothing but black.

 

\- [x] Typical.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so the reason why I did not choose to use abbreviations like (Y/N) is simply because I felt it was harder to be descriptive when you can only use things like (Y/N), (E/C) , (H/C) , ect. In fact, it isn't typical of me to use abbreviations what-so-ever.


End file.
